“The Sniffing Accountant”
First Script Read: September 8, 1993
Filmed: September 14, 1993
Aired: 9:00pm, October 7, 1993
Nielsen rating: 19.1
Audience share: 29
Directed: Tom Cherones
Writer: Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry, Kramer, and Newman suspect their accountant might be stealing their money to buy drugs after the accountant keeps sniffing when Jerry runs into him. Looking for proof, they follow the accountant. Kramer, who the accountant has never met, tries to get him to admit his drug use by engaging him in conversation at a bar. The accountant admits nothing, but is still sniffing. So the trio send him a strongly worded letter closing their account. Moments after Newman leaves to mail the letter, they realize the accountant was probably sniffing from the mohair sweater both Jerry and Kramer were wearing when they ran into him. Ultimately, though, Newman's failure to mail the letter is a disaster because it turns out the accountant was cheating them after all.
Meanwhile, George has a meeting at his father's friend's business in bra sales. George aces the interview:
GEORGE: No, but I have very good repute with women. Very good. Top form. And the first time I laid my eye on brassieres, I was enthralled.
FARKUS: Hmm. Tell me about it.
GEORGE: Well, I was 14-years-old. I was in my friend's bathroom. His mother's brassiere was hanging on the shower rod. I picked it up. Studied it. I thought, "I like this." I didn't know what way or what level, but I knew I wanted to be around brassieres.
FARKUS: That's incredible story. You have a remarkable passion for brassieres.
GEORGE: They are more than an underwear to me Mr.Farkus. Two cups in the front, two loops in the back. How do they do it?
FARKUS: Well, I think I can say, barring some unforeseen incident, that you'll have a very bright future here at E.D. Granmont.
For the second time in three episodes, George's career prospects are briefly soaring. But, as foreshadowed in a line that became a favorite on the Seinfeld set, an unforeseen incident came to pass. On the way out of the office George feels a woman's shirt, mimicking a move Elaine's new boyfriend Jake Jarmel used on her. George's attempt is a debacle. The woman is furious. She also happens to be the company's boss, so George's bra career crashes before takeoff.
Elaine's relationship with Jake is going perfectly until Jake neglects to use an exclamation point on a phone message from Elaine's friend who has just had a baby. The two get into a huge argument and the relationship crumbles.
Elaine's pettiness costs her a healthy relationship. Jerry's paranoia leads him to draw the wrong conclusion. But the really dangerous behavior is the creepy rubbing of a person's shirt. It costs George a job, and thwarts Newman's letter mailing when he attempts it on a woman at the mailbox.